“Dear [INSERT NAME],

It’s hard to believe that another year has passed!  You just can’t imagene the many blesings our family has experienced in 2012.  Bob was promoted in July to the position of CEO.  After the many long and tireless hours he’s committed to the compnay over the past 38 years, we are enjoying a more liveable wage of $650,000 per year.  I just don’t know how we managed to get by on the pittance of just half that all these years.  Now we will be able to afford the procedure to get rid of his little “wart” problem!

Buffy just graduated Magna Cum Laude of her class at Yale.  She missed Suma Cum Laude by .2% and attributes the oversight not to her lack of God given skill but to the Chemistry professor who suffered 3rd degree burns due to her exuberance with the beakers.  Her Cotillion was a smashing success and the young men continue their pursuit of her.  We eagerly await the arrival of the baby in March.

Biff continues his athletic prowess on the football field.  Although in the 8h grade, he is aggressively searching for universities that will compliment his love of sports and new interest in Pharmacology.  We were thrilled to hear of this new found interest and only learned of it when I was cleaning his room and discovered an amass of small, white pills and a chemistry set.  We are so proud of him!

Our little Abigale is keeping us busy as well.  At only 20 months, our littlest “oopsie” is already exhibting signs of brilliance.  She can speak in what we beleive to be Mandarin.  Daddy has become “bad dah” and Mommy “craziemum”.  Isn’t that just the cutest?”

As for me, well…I remain delightfully content and happy serving my family.  I had the pleasure of extended “Me Time” ;ast August.  Bob was so encouraging and supportive.  He surprised me with a 90 day vacation to a lovely spa.  My room was decorated with calming hues of gray padded vinyl and the concierge lovingly locked my room each night so I culd bask in the zen like state of restrained peace.  The institution ranch was very popular among the celebrity set as Lindsay Lohan, Mackenzie Phillips and Tara Reid were familair faces during our “group time.  The best part was that Bob’s new insureance plan payed for the whole stay!  A big thank you to Bob!

We wish you all the best for a properous and joyful new year!  Our hopes and prayers are that you and your family are as blessed as ours.”

Holiday Letter Do’s & Don’ts

♥

Do…

  1. Proofread, edit, spell check, repeat.
  2. Keep it brief; keep it humble.
  3. Be positive.
  4. Proofread, edit, spell check, repeat.
  5. Focus on events rather than achievements.
  6. Insert a  little humor.
  7. Consider your audience:  Co-workers and/or clients don’t want to read about your kid’s special achievements.  Consider drafting multiple letters to accommodate your audience appropriately.
  8. Proofread, edit, spell check, repeat.

Don’t…

  1. Share health related bombshells.  These can be embarrassing and uncomfortable not only for the person being written about but also for the recipients of your letter.
  2. Vent grievances.  Keep your gripes to yourself.
  3. Boast.  You are not better than anyone else.  You really are not.
  4. Share financial information.  Tacky.
  5. Overshare.  Please refer to point #2 under “Do’s”.
  6. Include embarrassing photographs.  A picture is a nice touch but keep it “generic”.
  7. Forget to proofread, edit, spell check, repeat.

Happy Holiday’s!  I’d love to hear your stories of holiday letters gone wrong!

K. Martini